Siblings

July 16, 2012
Siblings

One of our favorite dynamics in our groups at Learning on the Log, is when siblings join in. In a family where one child has any special needs, the sibling(s) are often lost in the shuffle. Because they are able to do things without extra help or attention, and their special needs sibling does need extra attention, the sibling may feel left out or that no one listens to their needs. They also may feel unsure of how to interact with their special needs brother or sister or feel embarrassed by their melt downs and reactions to things, they may not understand the lack of attention they receive and may resent it, and they may feel jealous of all the attention and “fun therapy” their brother/sister might be receiving. On top of those confusing feelings, the sibling usually also feels a strong protective pull towards their special needs brother/sister and feel it is their responsibility to watch out for them. When they join our camps, we can support them through all of these things. We help them to see how to interact with their brother/sister in a way that draws the out and motivates them to engage, they see that there are many other children similar to their sibling and who act the same way and they start to not feel so embarrassed by the outbursts, they feel comfortable in our groups because no one is judging their sibling for their unusual behavior, they are able to relax and just have fun because they don’t have to feel responsible for how others will perceive their brother/sister, and overall they get to enjoy their sibling and feel that the counselors are there to listen to them and help them process their feelings, just as much as their special needs sibling. They feel important and that their feelings are important. On the other side, it is also incredibly important to have siblings and typically developing children in our groups because it “ups” the social interactions for all of our campers. The natural interactions of the siblings draws our LOTL campers out of their shell, they attempt to emulate the social skills they observe, and they are drawn to a higher lever of interaction that you see less of when all the children are grouped in with others at their same level.The typical children and siblings learn empathy and understanding that all children are different and special and have their own strengths, and the children on the spectrum learn appropriate behavior and social techniques, which they are then attempting to emulate with other children and at home with their families