Recently I had a
political discussion with some friends.
Initially it was an innocent conversation about things we hear about in
the news. Quickly it turned to sharing contrasting views on both policies and
politicians. In the middle of the
discussion, I noticed that one friend stopped interjecting her opinion, and
then she stood up, and finally excused herself from the room.
It turns out that
she has a long history of family members engaging in political talk that ends
in personal fighting and insults. Her
emotional experience is very negative in these situations, so to her, there was
no question that this conversation would lead to personal hardship.
Rationalizing the
situation in her head had no impact on her, avoiding the situation did not help
either; but living through the conversation and seeing that all of us were
friends at the end, was incredibly relieving and stress reducing. She had an emotional corrective experience
that contradicted her previous belief that “Political conversations always lead
to personal hardship”.
The next time we
all gathered my friend took a chance by enduring the political talk until the
very end. Based on her past positive
experience, she knew we might not agree politically but our personal relationship
would not affected. With more of these
Emotional Corrective Experiences, my friend will become much more confidant and
comfortable; soon she may also feel safe enough to share her own opinion: even
if others disagree.
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